Monday, 24 June 2019

Bun In The Oven

Yep.
Pregnant again.

Now I am 33 weeks pregnant.
And my due is supposed to be in early August but with my 2 pregnancies, they were both born 2 weeks earlier.

I just got bad and good news.

Good news is I will get my cootu fund in July and August. Enough to hire a nanny/send the kids to nursery and buy a few baby's essential. Oh yeah I am expecting a girl this time so I'm overly excited!! πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜„

Bad news is that my husband won't be around in July. I am afraid that when it's time to deliver, nobody won't be around to stay with the kids. My parents are already old and have physical disabilities so I can't ask them to come to KL from Johor just to take care of these 2 monkeys. They are handful!

I was already planning to send them to nursery & preschool due to unable to get a helper (the cost going thru agent is more than 10k and neither me nor my husband has that much what with 3 kids now).

I've asked around about Filipino helper but most of them demands for RM2.8k salary monthly. Meanwhile the nursery monthly costs me RM2.9k monthly. And they want me to make visa pass for them which I don't know how nor have the time to do it.

Now I'm looking for Indonesian helper which is to no avail. I am already stressed with the house chores that seems never-ending plus they just add more mess day by day. Not to mention the 2 cats I have that have litters to be cleaned and food & water to be provided.

Never had I imagine that my life would turn 360 degrees from being single to being married with having 3 kids at such a fast pace. Seriously. I should tie my tubes after this. But I feel like getting more in the future. Another 2 max. haha now I'm not making any sense. Please ignore that! πŸ˜†

Gosh. Having kids are so expensive nowadays. No wonder my parents were so cheapskate when they were raising us all. A lot of other things to consider.

Another bad news is that I can only send the kids for a full term instead of just few months. My cootu funds cannot be used sending them for the whole semester (till end of year). But there is nowhere that I can send my kids to to ease things up at home. Even so, there are nurseries that runs illegally (not licensed or registered with local authorities).

I am still thinking what and how to ask my husband (more to persuade) to send the kids for whole semester.. I mean, for toddlers aged 12 mos to 18 mos, the nursery care at my place costs RM1.6k monthly. That is 3-4x the local's rate.. But their place is equipped with cams and certified & experienced nurses, so it is understandable why their rate is high.

Ahhh I am so stressed. I'm nowhere able to send them anywhere, and expecting #3 would just make me more exhausted.. Aiyaya


Baby girl is very shy and hesitated to show her face. Both her feet and hands up on the face. It was hard to get a look at her lovely face.. This is the best so far. Week 26.

PPUM LABOR AND DELIVERY STORY

Hola!
This post would be about my second birth experience at a government hospital which was PPUM (Pusat Perubatan Universiti Malaya).

Firstly, I went here because I want to try for VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarian). Not that I was not happy with my decision to do elective c-section, but I'd rather feels the pain for weeks rather than months. With an 18 months old toddler by my side, I need to get on my feet real quick. I don't have a helper anyway, but I did hire a confinement lady to take care of me and my baby for the first month to ease things up.

I went here quite late because I want to achieve VBAC in a good hospital equipped with everything necessary. In case if problems/complications arise, I would still be referred to government hospital anyway (if I deliver at private).

The first time I was there to book, I was scolded because I came late towards the end of the pregnancy but the nurse managed to book me an appointment (yes, need to book with RM500 deposit to give birth here before the first appointment). I was set as 'high risk' since I want to try for VBAC but that was just so that I'd be seen by the doctor (the doctors were quite fully booked, but unless if there are cases referred to by private hospital, they'll still have to take it) πŸ˜‚I'm not actually high risk case, but because I got a referral letter by my private gynae, so I was referred as that. Maybe it has something to do with the small gap between pregnancies and that I had c-section previously.

My first appointment was 1 half week after I went to set the appointment. What was needed to book?
1) RM500 for booking deposit.
2) MyKad/passport & a copy of you and your spouse's.
3) Marriage contract (sijil nikah/kad kahwin).

But as of my first appointment I still need to pay for registration which costs me RM16. I can't remember much but I guess that was all. I was not given any prescription as I still have my prenatal multivitamins. It took about less than 3 hours since 8.20 a.m. I arrived here to get all things done. Don't even let me talk about finding a parking spot. It was horrible! Took me almost half an hour to get one and that's not even inside the box πŸ˜‚

After making the payments, it was then the waiting game. I had to entertain my toddler and he just cannot sit quietly. He was 16 months or so that time, so I cannot expect him to sit still for more than 5 minutes. I was glad he's on formula milk because I couldn't imagine breastfeeding while pregnant. He never like my EBM, so I thought formula is the best. I've tried a few but I'm glad he's okay the first time I introduced him to new brand.

Okay, back to the story. My number finally got called after 1 hour plus of waiting. I gave her the referral letter as well as reports from my previous gynae. But she still asks me some questions that I think was on the paper, but I was happy to confirm with her again.

The doctor gave me a green light that I'm a good candidate for VBAC, even measured my hip to see if it's suitable for normal delivery. In my case this was considered as first delivery as I will attempt on labor or TOLAC (trial of labor after cesarian) to achieve VBAC. With my first, I was having slow labor and never get past 3 cm before the baby showed stress signals. You can read about it here and here.

I didn't know about any other patients who had done c-section if they had vaginal delivery the next pregnancy. But I joined a VBAC group in Facebook to get support. I was just a silent reader because I was too nervous to ask anything about it lol. But as it was evidence based, I read a lot about women not able to deliver normally because their hip is not suitable for childbirth. I mean how so? Women have been delivering a lot of babies since the beginning of time. When I think about it (and other people who comments on it), a lot of women also died in childbirth.

Normal birth is not what makes us a woman. In my opinion, it helps with house chores or getting back to work soon after, but if going for normal delivery risks the life of your unborn baby, it's so not worth it. What's the point of waiting 9 months (or less) just to get stillbirth? I was so naive before thinking that I want a normal delivery (first pregnancy) because that was what was asked and expected by everyone. I was happy that I delivered to a healthy baby boy and that the doctor's action was quick because there were signs of fetal distress before my water was broken. Even though I was quite pissed off with what my husband decided for me, I was half glad that he did. Yes, I am still pissed whenever I think about it. He never discussed anything with me, yet he got to decide for me. I was just beside him and not dead/passed out yet.

Okay back to the story. Haha I do babble a lot about things not related to the topic. Sorry for that πŸ˜€

I was given another appointment 2 weeks after the first. This time I had to do blood test and ultrasound before seeing the doctor so the reports can be seen by him/her. Total damage for the day was RM16 (registration), RM20 (ultrasound) and RM35 (blood test). Since it was still early in the morning, there were not that many people doing ultrasound, so I was seen after 15 minutes waiting. I'm glad my husband tag along because he can entertain that little cheeky toddler.

Being heavily pregnant, I really need someone to help. Even so, he just got time until lunch time since he had to go to the office afterwards. Eventhough the ultrasound was done in little time, the waiting part was really long. I think since we first arrived at the clinic around 9 (as usual, finding a parking spot was taking a long time), an hour or so has already passed.

Then, we had to go back up (ultrasound was at level 1, the clinic is at level 2) to see the doctor. But before that, I still have to check for urine and weight and blood pressure. That took quite a while because at that time, there were already many people doing so. After my blood pressure was taken, only then I have to wait to be called. I could still remember it was Monday and I was just a day pass 38 weeks (38 weeks +1 day).

It was taking forever to see the doctor and I was already having a butt sore. I wished my house is just at another level or there is a waiting room with bed there πŸ˜”My husband was of no help with the toddler as he was busy looking at his phone replying emails. I know he has tons of work and need to go back to the office, but never had I thought that it would take longer than 3 hours here. With my first appointment, I was seen in less than 3 hours but that was (maybe) because I got there early and need not to do anything (no test, no ultrasound). I guess I was wrong.

So guys, if you come at 10 a.m. or above, please don't expect everything to be over within 4 hours. Even my son had his nap and we got hungry by 2 p.m. In the end, my husband didn't go to work at all and we went home after lunch.

While I was inside the car, I noticed that my belly started having irregular contractions, but it was not painful, so I thought it was just Braxton Hicks. But, who knew the next day I was in labor already πŸ˜ŒπŸ˜‚

My real contractions started that night where I woke up in the middle of the night having painful but irregular contractions. I couldn't sleep until the next day lol. Luckily I managed to call the cleaners a day before to clean my house the next day. They came in the morning and I did tell my husband that I'm having regular contractions and asked him to standby and not to go to work in case if I give birth on that day. He was okay though but I saw him still reviewing documents and replying emails, so I didn't bother him anymore.

Meanwhile, my toddler, being like any toddler did everything that just annoys me (because I was in pain every 20 minutes and getting lesser). He jumped on the bed, made mess inside the room and I just didn't care as I was laying down embracing the pain πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…I was counting and looking at the time to count the contractions and how far apart it is. I didn't want to go to the hospital yet because I know labor won't start until the contractions are few minutes apart.

So, that morning I asked my best friend whom happened to be absent from work because she woke up late (god bless πŸ˜…πŸ˜‚) as someone has to stay at home with my son and someone has to accompany me to the hospital). Thank you, friend 😍😘

Since the cleaners came early, so they finish early. I only went to the hospital afterwards. I never had any signs of blood or broken water, but I still went there to get checked at. My friend dropped me by while she looked for a parking spot (it was 11 am) so I went straight to the pre-natal ward (before delivery) and was told to take off my clothes including the undergarments and put on a pink robe and loose skirt.

Oh yeah, by the way, do not ever wear a nail polish to the hospital because if in case you have complications like heart/breathing/blood problems which can be seen first thru the colour of your nails, it cannot be seen. So, no nail polish. I learnt it the hard way there.

After I was checked, my opening was still at 3cm, so they sent me off and only to come again if in case I have any blood show or my water breaks or that my contractions are regular and 5 minutes apart. So, I went back in what less than an hour there. Luckily my friend was still waiting. I updated her and that we have to go back now. She just told me she just got a parking spot lol.

However after I got home, I went to the toilet and saw that I had that bloody blood show. Why on earth must it show just right after I got back from the hospital? That time my contractions are already about 8-10 minutes apart and lasts for a minute or so. I couldn't do anything about my toddler and my husband was still busy in front of the screens. I was in so much pain during the contraction even breathing technique wouldn't help and I felt like screaming.

Everything my toddler did at that time seems to annoy me but luckily he's not that clingy and I was still in control. I tried my best to play and spent time with him because I didn't know how long will I be in the hospital after that.

Gosh. It reminds me of the time when I was having contractions with the first. It was around the same time it first started - midnight, and the pain more or less the same - intense but far apart. I was afraid a lot of things could happen like uterus rupture, and then blood loss and then death πŸ˜…It was based on being a silent reader on that vbac group. I kissed my little one and was actually crying not from the pain, but afraid of the consequences of attempting TOLAC at home, unassisted.

I told my friend (the one who accompanied me earlier) about it and that I need to go back to the hospital again, and I asked her if she could take care of my boy while my husband accompany me in the labor room. But she told me she's fasting and could only help sending me to the hospital and wait a bit in case I got sent off like earlier.

Turned out I was held up and sent to labor room because I was already 5cm dilated. So, I told her to go back and come to my house that night after she breaks her fast. But between 5cm to 10cm, it happened so fast that day.

Since PHONE IS NOT ALLOWED TO BE USED in the labor room, so I had to send her a message if she can go to my house earlier as I was afraid that I might deliver earlier. But I never forced her to do that, just I felt like my husband should be by my side, and I was feeling so lonely having a husband but as though not having one.

I kept telling myself that he's staying with our son and nobody else could look after him (I could not find any nannies/babysitter/relatives that are free that time), I had to let it go.

While I was having intense but regular contraction, I asked for epidural, but I was still afraid of taking one so I called it off (SORRY for wasting your time, anaesthetic teamπŸ˜‚).

By my side, there is a young doctor in training or HO (Houseman Officer) monitoring my every progress. I got fetal monitor on my belly as well as contraction monitor (?) and heart pressure taken all the time I was there. When it was time that my contractions were a minute apart, he asked for another doctor (MO) to come and check.

To my surprise, the doctor that came was the doctor that saw me during the check up a day earlier (yesterday), so she could still remember me. I was already 9cm so I was told to not push yet. But how can I not push when everytime the contractions came I felt like pushing??

At this point, I regretted not taking that epidural and it was too late to be taking one already..  I whispered to myself to TAKE IT if I got pregnant AGAIN πŸ˜†But I thought I was done with pregnancy and no more kids after this. Not with nobody to support me by my side.

I was in so much pain that I was hooked to the etonox gas (or entonox or whatever gas that made me high) everytime the contractions hit. My one hand was holding the gas mask and another holding the bed rail. Gosh. I was in so much pain than what I had experienced with my first. So, this is what normal delivery felt like? HA HA HA I didn't want to get pregnant and give birth again! Neither normal nor c-section! Turned out I was wrong heh.

I didn't realise when was it that from one person there were two and more coming in. By the time the doctor (MO) came to check my opening, I was already 10cm and was told to push. Damn. I'VE BEEN WAITING!! But I was too tired. It took me about 2 hours to push my baby out. I could remember it was 7 pm something and the nurses told me she couldn't reach my husband (at this point I don't care but I was a bit upset he's not there).

I was still taking the gas while pushing because the pain was just too intense! I told them I'm tired (coz I didn't sleep since I woke up in the middle of the might and I didn't have proper lunch, just breakfast) The doctor told me she'll do episiotomy to help the baby come out faster and reduce the risk of tear. As I was still conscious, I just said yes and I don't really care as long as the baby come out fast.

After a while, there were so many people inside the room including 2 HO, and few nurses (I don't have time to count-too many in my eyes) πŸ˜‚probably high from the gas but even that didn't give me so much relief from the pain. I noticed that a nurse is pushing my belly during the contraction and another told me to not close my eyes when pushing and to look at my belly. Ah, it was funny when I think about it again. What a moment. I also saw another two nurses by my legs and the MO getting ready to get the baby and kept telling me to push. Ah, I wish I got the chance to eat a chocolate bar (or two) for energy that time.

About 9-ish the baby came out and after getting checked, he was placed in my arm. YES, ANOTHER BOY! But as I was already weak at that time, he was taken for cleaning and will be passed after for breastfeeding. My husband came (finally) and told me that my friend is at home watching our first son. I was wondering whether he didn't want to be with me during labor or he simply has nobody to watch after the boy. Since it's government hospital (semi), kids under age 12 aren't allowed to enter the wards, so yeah he couldn't take the boy in right.

The baby was passed to me hours later and he was sleeping. Just like his big brother, he's got head full of hair and long, only of different style. He is fairer and does not look like his brother. Maybe he looks like me?


 This is us in post-natal ward. It took a long time for me to get transferred here.


He looks different than his brother but my husband said he looks the same.


This is his big brother that was born at DPCMC. Do they look alike at birth? I seriously don't think so.



Baby with daddy on day 2. I went to shower for a while and came back to this. Haiyoo my heart skipped a beat to see them both sleeping like that.

It was only after 5 days we were allowed to go back home. He got jaundice and was under the phototheraphy light. Plus, he is G6PD-deficient and it is in their SOP that babies with G6PDD need to be monitored for 5 days in the ward.

How was the stay?
6/10 It was only okay for 2 days. Bed was hard and uncomfortable I wish I was back home by day 2. Plus I had to take care of the baby myself. No guest is allowed to even stay the night with the mother. Baby stays with the mother. I was like a first time mother again - not knowing how to do this and that and having had to handle a crying baby while still tired after giving birth.

My milk only came by the end of day-2 so I was quite stressed before that I was afraid the baby would be hungry and that the lesser or the more late he drinks, he's going to get jaundice (that extends the stay). He also cried a lot that added up to the stress I was feeling.

How was the food?
8.5/10 okay so far so good. I like the food here. Maybe because it suits my taste naturally.

How was the service?
7/10 not bad. There were nurse trainee who always tends faster than the nurses there. 
Every early morning they will change the water in the jug to warm-hot water and put a small basin to bathe/clean the baby altogether with a small towel. I was still sleeping most of the morning and because there are stitches down there, my movements are limited. 

I could remember the next morning after I gave birth, I had to go pee (my pee tube were released and was told to get a walk). I could barely stand let alone walk but with the help of a nurse trainee. They were told to actually follow the patient until inside the toilet. When I sat down on the toilet, I felt like passing out. I was glad there's someone in there with me or I would've fell down onto the toilet floor.

Meanwhile the baby was taken for morning bath as I was still weak to do it myself (I'm glad they did!). I only got to see him while having breakfast (1 1/2 peaceful hours later) lol. This time I wished I had given birth at a private hospital where everything was taken care by the nurses there. Not that I don't want to bond earlier, but it can happen after I replenish my energy.

I had to stay for another 4 days, handled the baby without help, with body aches all over, and the stress of not having milk yet and baby cried non-stop, and got high jaundice a day after. It's very exhausting and stressful.

Lastly but not last, if I were to give birth again, I would choose this hospital. But if the case is the same as the second (milk come late, baby g6pdd and jaundice), I would sign the AOR paper (at own risk discharge) by day 2 and get myself or the baby checked in private.

I really cannot stand staying there having no help, and having had to move from room-room (to nursing room which was located towards the end of the hall to store my expressed milk (EBM)) was no help at all. My stitches had a gap by day 7 postpartum (went to KKIA to check) and the nurse told me it did not look neat or nice at all. That scares me like shit lol.

Overall, it was a so-so experience. I like the labor team. I had nobody by my side but they encouraged me to push harder and I didn't know if I were lucky or what but nobody yelled at me for taking sweet 2 hours just to push.

If I have the chance to book for a FPP programme, I would in my next pregnancy. It's not as expensive as private but I heard the stay is much better than under government. It is not semi private. It is just because you paid in full, so you get the advantages like what you would get in private. You can even choose which doctor you want.

Okay, I think that's all I want to share. More coming as I'm also pregnant with #3. I know it's too early but this one was not expected and unplanned.

There are so many advantages and inconvenience giving birth either in private or semi government or government. I never deliver in full government but I've seen my sisters and it was uncomfortable for a long stay they told me.

I'm not sure about you. Whatever you prefer, just make sure you are able to afford it if you want to deliver in private. If not, just go to wherever suits your pocket.

Honestly, now that I'm pregnant again, I tried to keep savings for hospital stay by my side in case I want to change mind. But surely I would use the money to buy a few baby things, instead of wasting them so much on comfort that lasts few days. We will see how it goes after a while.


Here are my babies few months ago. The baby's 4/5 months old  and his big brother is coming to 2. It's hard raising two kids under two. If anyone ever wonder how I get back to my original weight and shape, it's because I was busy chasing and playing with the toddler. Plus, breastfeeding also helped me with losing weight. Not that it's the same for everyone though.


This is the baby #2 now. He lost a lot of baby fat once he started crawling around 8/9 months. But he just started walking at 14 months. That's around the same time his brother walk too.

Okay that is all peeps! CHEERIOS! Have a nice day.

Sunday, 23 June 2019

Labor and delivery at DPCMC

Hola!
It's been a while since I write anything here. When it's time to write, I felt so tired and just sleep. When I'm inspired and awake, there are just so many things bothering me. One of them is, a toddler that keeps disturbing me with the keyboard and also a baby that needs to be fed every 1 hour or so.

Since I choose direct breastfeeding, the baby always latch on for an hour or less sometimes, and every 1 1/2 - 2 hours, so, my time is quite restricted to tend to them first. Not to mention I have to cook and feed the toddler as well. HECTIC.

But look, I am happy. And way better than before.

So, today I'm going to elaborate further about my pregnancy check-ups and L&D costs at private and government hospital.

For my #1, I delivered at Desa Parkcity Medical Centre in 2016. The cost was RM17k++ I went thru emergency c-section as there were signs of baby distress and I was having slow progress.
But put altogether, including my check-ups, I think the cost must've been 20k+ or more.

I went to a private clinic that was operated by doctors from Pantai Hospital as I thought of delivering there. I forgot their name but they're father and daughter, and yes, they work at the same place. The clinic is in TTDI (Klinik Wanita TTDI if I'm not mistaken). The monthly cost for a check-up there was about RM150-RM300. Sorry, I can't remember the exact price but it was always somewhere around that figures. It's cheap when you only do updates and regular scan (2D). But expensive when you were supplied with vitamins and medicines you need to take. I went there starting when I was 4 months pregnant till 7 months.

I only got to see the father as his daughter was fully booked as a lot of women wants their case to be handled by female gynae. He is okay. Frankly I did not know what to expect, hence only now that I'm writing about it.

Total check-ups I had done with him was 6 or 7 times and everytime it included 2D growth scan and everything was fine. But he did not do any tests on me which I was expecting like what KKIA done for expecting mothers.

Then I moved to Desa Parkcity and started seeing Dr. Jaspal. My first impression on him was, he's handsome xD but he is soft-spoken and gentle. Well, since I was a first time mother, I did not know what to expect. But now I know (after few appointments and postpartum checkups) that he is an experienced gynae and I believed he knows best in his area).

I had done every tests there and it costs me about RM3++ above every checkup. Plus, there are once or twice that I was prescribed with medicines, so the bill was RM4++ (JUST FOR 1 CHECK UP). Some people would think that's expensive (YES IT WAS FOR ME) but people from around here told me that's what they expected here. If they can afford living here, surely they can afford the medical fees. Just for your information, most of the residents are expats working in Malaysia or local businessman. What's so great about this place is that it's pet friendly :D *Let's talk about that in another post*

Did I mention that the labor and delivery charge at DPC MC was more than RM10K?
YES IT WAS!
It was RM17K++ for emergency c-section and because it was SATURDAY, so the charges is different than on weekdays within office hour. Plus, I stayed there for 5 frigging days. Supposed to be 3 days for c-section mothers, but then the baby got jaundice and was put under the phototheraphy light. Plus, I have nobody to help at home (yet) so I opted to stay there for 2 more days so that I don't have to move much to give him milk (I breastfeed).

I was totally bored after 3 days since there were not many visitors except for my husband. A friend or two came to visit, and so my stepdaughter who was still in school that time. She's not thrilled but not plain too. She looked rather nervous when she first entered the door lol. She just looked at the baby and as it was already more than 2 years ago, I cannot remember what she said.

Okay, enough reminiscing i guess.

How was the stay at DPCMC?
I could say 9/10 very good.

For single room, it was really spacious like you can put another queen bed there. It was 2 bedded room  but they only put 1 bed, so it's got plenty of space. There are 1 reclining sofa, and 1 chair with coffee table inside so guests can stay and be comfortable in case if they wanna sleep there.
The aircond can get quite cold especially at night but luckily it can be adjusted. I always keep it between 20-22 degrees celcius. Sometimes I turned it off because my throat got so dry. I wished I knew about humidifier that time lol xD

How was the food?
8/10 taste like any hospital food but the presentation was okay.

How was their service?
9/10 Fast and reliable. one button call and within a minute they're there. Plus baby stays at the nursery if it's your choice. They can be formula fed (again, your choice) and mothers can have more time to sleep and rest.

How was the c-section experience?
Hmmmmmm, not so good but I'm glad (now when I think about it) I didn't have any problem like open wound or pus coming out. The doctor did a very good job I guess.
But it was still painful even 7 months postpartum. Even when I wanna have sex with my husband, rough movements can inflicts pain at the site. Having sex was so uncomfortable that I started having first one (PP) after 3 months. Moving around was painful let alone sneezing or coughing. I also cannot laugh much, but who cares when someone makes jokes right? lol. I lived my life as usual. Took care my baby myself. Kind of missed that bonding time with my first newborn (now that i have the second one)

And as my husband just got a new job, he had to go offshore for a week up to 3 weeks sometimes. So, I just ordered food. Starting then, I never did much on cooking or cleaning the house except for laundry. I called cleaners to come every two weeks and they'll clean everything. I was lucky I married to a man who's got everything ready in his house including a washing machine and dryer. It's very convenient when you stay at condo or apartment.


That is my firstborn baby. He's so full of hair. I heard if you're having heartburn often that's because
the baby has lots of hair. Not sure until now it's just woo or truth.


This is him now. Still full of hair and my husband said his hair is like 'dawai besi' because it's so straight and heavy.


He is going to be 3 years old in September. But he looks like 4/5 years old. Still cannot make a full sentence and speaks gibberish, But he does understand what people said (in English). He walks at 1y2m and talks at 19m or so but he's the most lovely and he's the one who taught me how to love and to be loved. True love.

Next, you can read about my experience giving birth at goverment hospital in the next post.